Hard day yesterday.
I was going great — happy, joyful — up till I sensed after church that I was being religious with all this. That’s one of the key triggers for me. As soon as I feel like I’m hearing that I’m being legalistic with this whole process, or (often) when someone else suggests I am, I ran back to safety (=eating whatever I want). And generally this means lots of sugary food… Which it definitely did in this case.
I fell into a hole after that which I didn’t manage to climb back out of for the rest of the day.
But after messing up at church, I did finish the fast I felt I was supposed to do. So that’s a small victory.
One of the things God gave me yesterday was Galatians 3:3 — He reminded me I need to spend time worshipping. Having begun in the Spirit, I should never try to switch back to being perfected by the flesh… A harsh view of God can lead to both fear of God’s punishment and resentment towards God. And bitterness is a deadly thing. Lord, I want to know how to step away from bitterness every time it arises! Keep my eyes set on you and my mind clear of those wrong mindsets!